Who am I? Countless people have asked themselves this question in the course of their lives and that's exactly what happened to me. I asked myself this question over and over again and came to exciting self-knowledge. Nevertheless, it is often difficult for me to accept my true self and to act from it. Especially in the last few weeks, the situations have led to me becoming more and more aware of my true self, my true heart's desires, but not living them out. In this article, I will reveal to you who I really am, what I think, feel and what characterizes my innermost being.
The recognition of the true self - My heart's desires
In order to find your own true self again, to become the true person that is hidden deep within you, it is important to first become aware of your true self again, to recognize who you really are. In that regard, we humans are in a constant struggle. We often wrestle with our innermost being and do not manage to live what we are, what we really want. Basically, every human being has a unique soul, his true self, which is hidden in his own omnipresent reality and tries to be lived over countless incarnations. It is a long way to reach this goal and it also took a lot for me to recognize this true me. The main journey began for me at the beginning of my spiritual development. I collected my first groundbreaking self-knowledge and then began to change, found more to my inner self. During this time I studied countless spiritual, system-critical and other sources, which enabled me to shed many lower behavior traits. I stopped judging other people's lives, became more peaceful and realized that my innermost being is a peaceful and loving being. Basically, I'm someone who has a good heart, someone who only wants the best for other people, don't hold grudges, hate or anger against the lives or thoughts of other living beings. Nevertheless, although I became more and more aware of my true soul, my heart, at the same time I also distanced myself from it. This happened because I let addictions dominate me over and over again. I smoked weed a lot during this time, didn't always eat well and neglected my life, which firstly made me colder again and secondly triggered a strong dissatisfaction in myself. Even though I did all this and put a heavy strain on my social environment, it was always my greatest wish that I end all this, let go, so that I can continue to live the life I had always dreamed of. I wanted to fully live out the good side in me and draw a completely positive reality from this high-vibrating source. My goal has always been to step out of chaos in order to be able to confidently create a life that is characterized by love, compassion and strength.
The greatest lessons in life are learned through pain!
Then the day came when my ex-girlfriend left me, I was on the mend but this event made me feel deep sadness and pain again. I let my guilt consume me for a short period of time, unable to comprehend how in all this time I never realized what it meant to me. She was always there for me and for 3 years she always gave me all her love and all her trust, supported me in all my projects. But I hurt her nature over and over again, until she could no longer rightly and left me, the bravest decision of her life. But after the time I realized that it had to happen that way and that I got the chance to take my life back into my own hands. I gained a lot of new self-knowledge and learned a lot about relationships, love and togetherness, now understood the meaning of a relationship and realized that such shared love is something to always cherish, something that is sacred and gives you joy in life. I also learned about the mistakes I made and continued on my journey. After the time I caught myself again and felt much better. However, there was an inner unrest in me because once again my actions were not in line with my heart's desires. I didn't give up my addiction to smoking, I only ate what I wanted to a limited extent and neglected my great passion for being active on this blog, for actively communicating with people who deal with these topics in the same way, people for whom it means a lot to be in contact with me stand. Then came 2 weeks in which my best friend was on vacation. I was supposed to be able to cope with my life now, but now I started walking around with him every day and drinking a lot of alcohol. Again there was an inner discord within me. On the one hand, I really enjoyed it and got to know a lot of new people, made interesting acquaintances and hardly cared about anything. But on the other hand, it wasn't what I really wanted. Every morning I woke up completely exhausted and overtired and thought to myself that this lifestyle does not correspond to my true self at all, that I do not want and need it, that it fulfills me much more to be free, of course, free from all fears and negative thoughts than this makes me really happy. When I do that and live out my desires, it unleashes an incredible creative potential in me, which enables me to shape life according to my desires.
Caught in the vicious cycle
The whole thing then escalated and again there was dissatisfaction, dissatisfaction with myself that I wasn't doing what corresponded to my true nature, what I really wanted. I moved away from it more until the line came to an end. I didn't want to go on like this any longer, told myself that I would finally like to do it, that I would finally act from my heart and would only like to do what corresponds to my soul, so that healing can finally take place, so that I can finally start free of these lower trains of thought that are driving me charged again and again. The whole thing happened yesterday, after I came back from a festival at 6 o'clock in the morning, completely exhausted. The next morning, I thought intensely about all of this, it went on all day and late into the night. I let myself be shown all the situations and made it clear to myself again that I can change my state of consciousness right now, in this moment, in order to create a future that corresponds to my ideas 100%. I knew it wouldn't be easy, especially in the beginning, but I was fed up, I finally wanted to prove it to myself and do what I always wanted to do again. I quit my addictions that night and shifted my focus to love and passion. What fulfills me are different things. On the one hand, I want to live out my good side and not let poisons and other things numb me. I don't want to smoke anymore, eat naturally, do a lot of sport and take care of my website. There were phases where I managed to do that for a week, in which I was so clear and felt great. Another goal is to be there for my family and friends. Dealing positively with everyone and strengthening the ties that connect us. But this goal is necessarily linked to the other, because at least that's how it is for me, I can't be friendly or friendly. Deal with my loved ones with a zest for life when I'm not myself, when I'm dissatisfied with myself. So I did what I always wanted, put down all my self-imposed burdens and sat in front of the PC. The days and nights were exhausting but I just did it now. I jumped over my shadow to finally be the person I wanted to be. I wanted to be myself again, my soul. Today was not easy, I got up exhausted and still felt marked by the last few days. But I didn't care, I told myself that I will change everything now and so I continued. A few hours passed and now I'm sitting here in front of the PC and writing this text to you, giving you an insight into my life.
The change, acceptance and letting go of old patterns
I ended my inner struggle and let go of my negative thoughts. I ended the negative circumstances I created over and over again and relinquished control. You don't need control, on the contrary, the clearer you are, the more you act out of the present and can accept the circumstances as they are and that's exactly how it looks. Everything is supposed to be, is and will be exactly as it is in this present moment that has always existed, otherwise something completely different would have happened. Everything that happens to you in life is only a reflection of your own vibration level, your own thoughts with which you mainly resonate and only you are able to create a life according to your own ideas due to your own consciousness. When you have a goal, no matter how impossible it seems, no matter how hard it seems to reach, never give up, because everything is possible if you believe in it and give everything for your goal, if you can put all your focus on it You are doing the impossible and that's what I'm going to do now. I will create the seemingly impossible in my life and focus fully on my inner being, my body and my heart's desires, because that fulfills me, so I will be free and be able to draw a love that, because of this, the entire universe and will flow through all its inhabitants therein. In this sense, I hope that you enjoyed this insight, maybe even inspired you and wish you a life in harmony, peace and self-love. No matter who you are and what you are thinking, never let it get you down and live life according to your innermost ideas, you have the choice and can achieve anything you want, you just have to believe in yourself and never give up!